Nintendo Wii Fanboy

The wrist strap can't save you from everything that could possibly go wrong while playing Wii games -- especially if a pesky light fixture just happens to jump in the way while you're getting your tennis on. That's what happened to actor Zachary Levi, star of NBC's upcoming Chuck. He served a little too enthusiastically in Wii Sports tennis, and put his hand through the light with so much force "there were shards of glass in the wall." We can only hope it ended in an ace.

Levi's mishap resulted in a trip to the emergency room and fourteen (!) stitches. But hey, at least he didn't sue, like some folks. After all, it's not like Nintendo put the light there. But take it from Levi, and look up before you serve.

[Via GoNintendo]

Call us old-school, but it just doesn't seem like Mario Party without damage to controllers or players. Our college dorm was a mausoleum of N64 controllers, their lifeless joysticks rattling limply around in the casing, dooming us to a fate of smaller Smash Bros. matches. However, with the substitution of waggle for rotation, those days of joystick fatigue and court-mandated free thumb gloves may be over.

Being dedicated Wii players, have you managed to find a way to hurt yourself or your Wiimote playing Mario Party 8? Has the combination of Mario Party and projectile Wiimotes caused a deadly nexus of TV destruction and personal injury? Or is your thumb happy now that you've found a new way to Party?

[Thanks for the topic suggestion, Zack!]

LCDArm has started marketing (but not yet selling) a piece of plastic that goes over an LCD TV screen and protects it from ... miscellaneous projectiles. The nature of these projectiles is not made explicit, but we can think of only one item that has gotten attention for busting people's televisions. We might be electronic Darwinists who believe that people who can't keep their Wiimotes in hand shouldn't have fancy TV's, but that's no reason not to take precautions against friends' sweatiness.

The device is also an anti-glare shield, designed to block harmful ultraviolet light (in the words of the PR blurb: "Reduces ultraviolet (UV) rays and health to human eyes"). You know, because you don't want to see all of that light that comes out of your TV. Wait, reduces health to human eyes?

[Via Joystiq]

Some folks will do anything for a little attention, and we're happy to oblige, particularly when we get to showcase our big daddy blog Joystiq in a spot of debunking. A reader sent them pictures of his bruised face (and bruised television) and blamed the whole thing on the Wii. He really should have blamed his poor Photoshop skills. Next time you try to scam folks, may we suggest not choosing the second result on a Google image search? Make us dig a little deeper.

Apparently, Wiinjuries and Wiisasters are the hip new accessories for gamers everywhere. Forgot those NES belt buckles. The cool kids 'chop in fake Wii wounds for their MySpace pics, and the more hardcore idiots are probably going around actually punching one another in the face with Wiimotes. We just hope someone films it. Where's Jackass when you need it?

On a side note, anyone else think the word "wiinjuries" should die along with all these yawnariffic claims of Wii-related disasters?

While incautious use of the Wiimote will (probably) not result in death, there are apparently some risks involved with the components of your new console. Nintendo's manuals are chock full of warnings, and in fact, a screen reminding players to be sure and employ the wrist strap pops up with annoying frequency. But what about those situations that aren't covered in the manual? You may not shoot your eye out playing Red Steel, but we keep waiting for the first stories of flying Wiimotes clocking people in the head.

Worried about all the possible heinous outcomes? 1UP prepared a handy visual guide to possible "Wiinjuries" both physical and psychological. Who knew that Wii caused cancer? According to the above photo, it just might ....

Check after the jump for more personal story.