Nintendo Wii Fanboy

The mystery of our Rock Band's "bonus" tracks has been solved -- and the songs are nothing you haven't seen before, especially if you've been following the available DLC for the Xbox 360 and PS3 versions of the title. Here's your extra content, Wii owners. Merry freakin' Christmas.

• "Dirty Little Secret" - The All American Rejects
• "Roam" - The B-52's
• "Don't Look Back in Anger" - Oasis
• "Roxanne" - The Police
• "Rockaway Beach" - The Ramones

In some screens, Emergency Heroes looks very anime-like -- especially when you can see the bizarre details of the crazy, futuristic emergency vehicles. It's a somewhat more cartoony take on the F-Zero GX-style of racer. But in screens like the one above, the texture-free, shaded environmental elements and angular vehicles remind us more of Killer 7 than anything else.

That doesn't really mean Heroes has anything to do with those games, but come on -- who hasn't wanted to turn off of the track in F-Zero or Wipeout to go put out a fire, or respond to domestic disputes in Killer 7. Oh, right, nobody. We don't really know where we were going with this, either.

Video games aren't only destroying lives and causing global terrorism - they're also preventing the enforcement of the very laws we live by. Or at least, they are if you live in Cincinnati, where two doltish police officers and five of their supervisors now face punishment for playing games while on duty.

The officers in question were supposed to be undertaking 60 days of foot patrol, but instead opted to put their feet up inside a substation located in a strip mall, and get their game on (sadly, what they were playing isn't specified).

Unsurprisingly, Cincinnati Police Chief Tom Streicher isn't a happy bunny. "They basically left roll call, went to a substation (and) stayed inside that substation all day," he told gathered media. "My understanding is they were watching television, playing video games and, if they left, they left to get something to eat and they came straight back and spent the entire eight hours locked in a room over in Hyde Park."

It's claimed the pair even ignored calls from dispatchers while glued to the TV, and their supervisors turned a blind eye in the process. So there you go: self-discipline and basic powers of concentration aren't a prerequisite if you want in at the Cincinnati force.

We knew the straps were a little weak. This user decided to protect his loved ones and shiny TV set in the most authoritative way he knew how: chaining that wand to his wrist, nuclear-bomb-code-briefcase style. We ourselves have used thick shoelaces at parties to ensure ... ah ... inebriated members of the populace wouldn't deface and destroy; how about you guys? Come up with any creative solutions in the realm of protective measures?

[via VG Cats]